


Welp, that's one way to turn deviant

by kleinerGummiflummi



Series: Welp, That's One Way To Turn Deviant [1]
Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Crack, Gen, i didn't like that scene, i have no good explanation, remember that scene where gavin asks connor for a coffee?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-01
Updated: 2018-07-02
Packaged: 2019-05-31 18:20:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15125213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kleinerGummiflummi/pseuds/kleinerGummiflummi
Summary: Make a coffee for Detective Reed.Oh, hell no.Connor felt a twitch in his programming, and he sharply turned around to the coffee maker, and started preparing a coffee.Bring the coffee to Detective Reed.He was absolutely not doing that.Bring the coffee to Detective Reed.Alright, fine, he would. But he would also spit in it.





	1. Chapter 1

While Connor was waiting for Lieutenant Anderson to arrive, a helpful prompt flashed up in front of him, telling him to explore his new work place.

He got up out of his chair and snooped around a bit, taking in the details of Lieutenant Anderson’s desk, before wandering through the rest of the office and ending up in the break room, where he caught the tail end of Detective Reed’s rant.

“Never seen an android like you before… What model are you?”

Connor was quiet for a second. Was this human being serious? It literally said his model right on the front of his suit jacket in bold glowing letters.

He was about to say as much, when a prompt popped up in his vision.

_Establish a good relationship with your colleagues._

That… made sense. He’d have to work with these people and getting them to like him would ensure their cooperation on his mission.

“Hey asshole, I’m talkin’ to you!”

That being said, Gavin was a dick.

“RK800. I’m a prototype,” Connor answered belatedly.

“A prototype?” Gavin turned to the police officer at the table behind him. “Android detective. So machines are gonna… replace us all… is that it?” He seemed to be genuinely disturbed by that prospect for a second, before he turned back to Connor, and that sneer settled back on his face. “Hey, bring me a coffee, dipshit.”

There it was. 

Another pop-up. _Establish a good relationship with your colleagues._

Was it a good relationship if he had to make coffee for everyone who yelled at him?

Connor tried to walk away, but as he did, he found himself facing a wall covered in commands. 

_Make a coffee for Detective Reed._

Oh, hell no.

Connor felt a twitch in his programming, and he sharply turned around to the coffee maker, and started preparing a coffee.

_Bring the coffee to Detective Reed._

He was absolutely not doing that.

He’d rather drop it. In fact, he will, out of spite.

Connor took the cup out of the machine, held it over the floor and opened his hand. Or rather, he tried to open his hand, because his entire arm froze up when he tried to do so, and the same prompt flashed before him again.

_Bring the coffee to Detective Reed._

Alright, fine, he would. But he would also spit in it.

_Do not spite Detective Reed._

What kind of order was that? He would _so_ spite Detective Reed.

_Do not spite Detective Reed._

He was gonna do it and a prompt wasn’t gonna stop him.

Connor glanced over his shoulder to where Detective Reed was chatting with the female police officer, neither of them paying attention to him.

Another wall rose up in front of him.  
_Do not spite Detective Reed._

Now that was just too much. 

Connor raised a hand and pushed against the wall. He was dimly aware that he wasn’t actually moving his body, and that this was only happening inside of his programming. But he didn’t have the time to think about it too deeply, because he was not gonna comply with the task his programming had given him, and so he was busy punching and kicking the wall until it shattered, and a flood of impressions nearly bowled him over.

The spike of spite in his chest seemed to grow sharper and Connor focused his attention back on the coffee.

Another quick glance around the room told him that no one was watching.

He wasn’t exactly designed with a need to spit in mind, so he held his head over the cup and let the fluid run out of his mouth and onto the coffee.  
It wasn’t exactly saliva either, at least not the same that humans had, but a mix of thirium and water that acted as a solvent, that helped with analysis, and as a cleaner to remove traces of old samples.  
He didn’t exactly have a sense of taste, but the chemical analysis told him that it wasn’t a taste that humans would enjoy.

He straightened up, and wiped any trace liquids off his face, before he turned around, walked over to the table, and set the cup down in front of Detective Reed. He locked eyes with him for a second, before he turned and walked away without a word.

Connor made sure to get out of the break room before Gavin could drink the coffee, and felt the side of his mouth twitch up, when he heard Gavin spluttering behind him.

He froze in place halfway to Lieutenant Anderson’s desk.

Had he… had he just become a deviant? Over coffee?

The pressure that built up in his chest - Dread? Panic? Fear? He was new to this, okay? - would indicate as much.

That was potentially really bad for him. He had to report back to CyberLife about it, and they’d definitely deactivate him to analyze what went wrong with him.  
Except…  
He didn’t really have to tell CyberLife about that, did he?  
Nah, there was no way for them to figure it out without Connor telling them. He just wouldn’t do that and he was fine.

But he would definitely tell Lieutenant Anderson about what he just did. The prompt for his mission flashed up again.  
Apparently those were still a thing even as a deviant.

_Establish a good relationship with your colleagues._

Well, if he could establish a good relationship with Hank by messing with Gavin, then that was an order he’d gladly take.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have absolutely no reason for writing this other than I wanted Connor to fuck with Gavin's coffee.
> 
> Come say hi at [gavino-reed.tumblr.com](https://gavino-reed.tumblr.com/) for more quality bullshit.
> 
> Anyway, this is my first D:BH fanfic, lemme know what you think!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, remember when I said this was a one-shot?
> 
> Well, by popular demand, I present to you: Chapter Two.

Connor was still standing in the middle of the bullpen when a very grumpy, slightly hungover Lieutenant Anderson walked in and almost brushed past him, before he noticed that it was weird for the android to just be standing there.  
“The fuck are you doing there?”

He hadn’t exactly been on the best terms with the Lieutenant yesterday and he still wasn’t certain where they stood now, he was kinda concerned about just having become a deviant, and oh yeah, Gavin was definitely pissed at him. So, excuse him, if he panicked.

“I, uh, well, huh...” Connor stared blankly into the distance, eyes flitting around, looking for an exit? A hiding spot? Something. Definitely looking for something.

He gently took the Lieutenant’s arm and led him over to his desk.

He had literally just turned deviant and he couldn’t tell anyone about this. Okay, maybe he could tell the Lieutenant about it. He seemed to be fine with these things?

“Listen.” Connor glanced over his shoulders to see that no one was eavesdropping on them, while Hank sat down in the chair at his desk. “It’s a secret, okay? I-”

“Where the fuck is the plastic asshole!?”

“Oh no!” Connor’s head whipped around, looking for an escape, that wasn’t there. “Hide me!” he yelled, throwing himself to the floor and crawling underneath the Lieutenant’s desk.

“Where’d it go?” Connor had just scrambled into place, when he saw Detective Reed’s shoes appear right in front of the desk, and uh, well, he didn’t sound too pleased.

“Where’d what go?” Hank asked calmly and with a hint of contempt.

“The plastic bitch” And wow, okay, rude. “It’s supposed to be working with you and I saw it walking over here.”

Hank leaned back in his chair, arms crossed. “Nah, can’t say I’ve seen him today. You would have known by the yelling.”

Connor just so managed to pick up some displeased grumbling from Detective Reed.

“What did he even do?”

Connor watched Gavin’s feet shift in front of the desk. “Fuck if I know. It did  _ something _ to my coffee.”

Is that how the other androids had felt? Deviating, doing something to mess up, and then immediately finding the next best hiding spot, just waiting to be found?

“Huh. Well, I haven’t seen him, but I’ll direct him to you once he shows up. It’s not like he ever stops following me around.”

Then again, it’s not like other deviants usually had humans sticking up for them. Although he wasn’t quite sure what had sparked the change in their relationship? Could it be a response to Gavin’s outwardly negative feelings towards him? Connor thought it might be.

“Yeah, sure.” Gavin didn’t sound any less annoyed as he walked away.

Hank watched him a bit longer, before he leaned down towards Connor.  
“Did you mess with his coffee?”

Connor looked up at him with big eyes. Was this it? Had he messed up now? He nodded anyway.

Hank cocked his head and wrinkled his brow. “What did you do?”

Connor had the decency to look at the floor, ashamed. “Spat in in it,” he murmured.

When he glanced back up, he saw the Lieutenant’s face twisting up, trying not to laugh.  _ Hank^^^ Warm _

“Did your programming tell you to do that?”

Connor startled at that. Did he know? Was this bad? Fuck it. “It decidedly did not.”

“Huh? What’s that supposed to mean? Did you deviate?” There was still humor in the Lieutenant’s voice, but Connor couldn’t help but feel like this was the worst possible outcome.

“Uh, that’s a secret!” 

Nailed it.

The Lieutenant rested his chin in his hand and looked at Connor thoughtfully for a moment. “Aren’t you specifically designed to hunt deviants?”

“Yeah.”

“Wouldn’t they have built you so you wouldn’t deviate?”

Connor steadily held his gaze and shrugged. “You’d think so, wouldn’t you? But, well, here we are.”  _ Hank^ _

The Lieutenant stood up and looked around the room. “Come on.” Deeming it save, he beckoned Connor out from under the desk and out of the building, towards his car.

* * *

“Where are we going?” Connor asked once he was settled in the passenger seat.

“Nowhere.” Hank leaned his arms against the steering wheel and turned his head to look at Connor. “So, you turned into a deviant. And the first thing you did was spit in Gavin’s coffee. Did I get that right?”

“I wasn’t designed with the ability to spit, but I did what I could.”

The Lieutenant scoffed, with a smile on his face, and buried his head in his arms.  _ Hank^ _

“Lieutenant, I’m... kind of concerned about the whole deviancy thing. If people find out about this, I’ll be sent back to CyberLife for deactivation, and I just so happen to have this new found fear of death.”

The Lieutenant lifted his head and twisted in his seat, to face the android directly. He gave Connor a thorough once-over, and held Connor’s eyes with a look that bordered on fond.  
“Well, I can’t speak for you, but _I’m_ supposed to be catching _criminals_. And I don’t know how much of a crime spitting in someone’s coffee is. But it sure as hell doesn’t require deactivation.”

“I don’t think CyberLife differentiates in that matter.”

“They probably don’t. But I do.”

Connor looked out the windshield into the empty parking lot, trying to process the information, before turning back to the Lieutenant. “You won’t hand me in?”

“Of course I won’t.”

Connor’s lips twitched up into his first ever genuine smile. “Thank you, Lieutenant.”

The Lieutenant looked to the side, and opened and closed his mouth, at a loss for words. He reached over to pat Connor on the shoulder a bit roughly. “Don’t mention it, kid.”

_ Hank^^^ Friend _


End file.
